An interesting coincidence, or a conspiracy by the NYTimes?

1. An excellent article by John Pareles on Dylan's "songs that are information collages. Allusions and memories, fragments of dialogue and nuggets of tradition have always been part of Mr. Dylan's songs, all stitched together like crazy quilts."

2. Phil Patton talks about the similiarities (theft?) of various different cars. "Doesn't that new Nissan Maxima look like a larger-scale Saturn Ion? Could the Kia Sorento be a Lexus RX 300 in disguise? Doesn't the face of the Nissan Z look like that of the Toyota Celica (and its taillamps like those of the Lexus SC 430)? Is that the new Bentley — or the new Hyundai?"

WHAT'D THEY PUT IN THE WATER: I MUST NEVER HAVE BEEN THIRSTY IN HIGH SCHOOL

I'm not a journalist. I don't like talking to people on the phone, let alone people I am related to. I screen my calls at work, at home, and on my cell, and I return those rather haphazardly if at all. Clearly I am a good candidate for a blog, which is why I hide here in total anonymity (Hi mom!).

However, if I was a journalist, I would be making telephone calls, sending emails, faxing, cajoling, bothering, annoying, and talking to people from my old high school (Darien High School, in Darien, CT) to try and figure out what the fuck they put in the water there, and how come I spent 4 years there and didn't drink any of it the magic elixir.

This morning I received an email about Freewilliamsburg.com, an online magazine of sorts focused on Williamsburg, Brooklyn. I clicked on the link to check it out, and saw that there is an interview with Paul Yates, a film maker dood who made a movie called "Porn" (figure FB.com covered it, right).

So, the name rings a bell in my empty noggin, not loudly, but a one of those small ones they have at rural post offices so the customer can alert the postal worker that he needs to get off the delivery girl and come up to the counter and do some work.

The bell was rung because I used to know a Brandon Yates who was an A.V. kid (A.V. in my school was kewl, not like loserish as portrayed on "My So Called Life" or "The Breakfast Club," and I was thinking I was remembering something about there being a Paul in his family. Lo, there is.

Here's the article:
http://freewilliamsburg.com/july_2003/paul-yates.html

This small but significant rung bell made me realize the abnormal number of semi-famous people who have come out of my high school. If this had been over a great span of years, it wouldn't be all that noticeable. However, I was a relatively smart kid and managed to graduate in four years (my mother being the head of the English department couldn't have hurt; she got me a crucial extension on a take-home grammar test once), and the "celebs" I am seeing in the papers and on T.V. were all there while I was. Meet the cast:

Chloe and Paul Sevigny
Moby
Paul Yates
Alex Michel, "The Bachelor" - the first one, when it still meant something to be on reality t.v. shows
Alex Kelly, the preppy rapist on the run

Darien is nicknamed "Aryan," which tells you a lot about the town. It's verdant and lush and wealthy and close to NYC and snobby and elitist and kid-safe and boring. While not all the above people are famous for good reasons (or even of their own accord), it is odd that they were all there with me.

It is also odd that I have not made a single dent in society in any manner whatsoever. I think while they were all out in the smoking section acting and being cool and making friends and having what are often referred to as "experiences," I was in my car gambling with a few of the other malcontents (we were like a trench coat mafia without the guns or coats or goth music pretensions) at blackjack and Texas Hold 'Em ($2 limit) and being a royal dork. I didn't even know we had a smoking section until it was taken shut down my junior year.

So maybe this blog will make me famous. Or maybe it's just another sign I am still a loser. Either way, I don’t care. I knew them when . . . and I'm selling the yearbook pictures to "Entertainment Tonight" for hundreds!!!!!!!!

Cock-Blocked by Friendster

A reputable source gives an exclusive to The Farm: Friendster is down! Friendster is down!

INTERVIEW WITH A MEMBER OF THE FARM WHO WAS ONCE KISSED BY A NOW FAMOUS ACTRESS IN THE SCHOOL AUDITORIUM DURING AN ALL-SCHOOL ASSEMBLY, THE PURPOSE OF WHICH HAS LONG ESCAPED HIM

Q: I heard that in high school you were once kissed by a now famous actress. Who was it?

A: I don't want to say.

Q: Come on. Tell me.

A: No, I shouldn't.

Q: Please. Just tell me.

A:  . . . No . . .

Q: Please?

A: . . .

Q: Dammit, just tell me.

A: Fine. Chloe Sevigny.

Q: Nice! . . . Swear it's true?

A: Promise.

Flaming with The Lips

A good interview with Wayne from The Lips is at CNN.com. While The Farm promotes and encourages listening to The Lips, we are really posting this because a close friend to The Farm once got to dress up as a bunny, hold a mega-watt powerful flashlight, and dance around on stage with the band because she knew someone whose cousin was doing the lights for Beck who had The Lips opening up for him that night at a show in NYC. The afterparty was at Plant but only some other people who dressed up and got to go on stage were there. No band members.