Suburban Office Park Etiquette Tip #1

When entering your office park's parking area, turn down the volume on the Dead Kennedys' "Too Drunk to Fuck" playing on your car stereo. You'll have less explaining to do in the elevator, as you ride up with the group of fiftysomething senior vice presidents you almost ran over.

editor's note: Jello Biafra is probably almost fifty, but no office park can contain him.