Anonymous Web Poster Threatens Life of Online Ad Application Developer
NEW YORK, April 16 -- A Web-based writer has used his "blog" site to threaten a life of an online search-and-advertising application developer, whom the writer claims "totally buggered" his Web browser. The writer, who sources say is a man in his early-to-mid-30s, posted an article accusing an as-yet-unidentified software developer of creating an "insidious piece of shit app" that, he said, replaced the default search functionality of his Web browser with a program that directs pop-up ads to his desktop and provides unwanted search results alongside legitimate results.
"Whoever did this is the spawn of Satan and deserves to die slowly and with great, searing pain," the man wrote. "He or she is a disgusting, gelatinous pod of useless tissue that should be crushed under foot." The man went on to write that the developer and the "fucknuts that employ him or her" should "have a cardboard box full of broken glass dropped on his or her head from pretty high up."
The man claims that all of his attempts to disable the application and to restore the default settings on his browser, including uninstalling the errant program; replacing it with a different search application, "Google Toolbar;" and e-mailing the company that created the application for help, have failed.
"I'll kill 'em, I swear it," the man wrote. "They will forever rue the day they fucked with my shit. I will go completely cock-a-hoop on their asses, I mean it."
Sources said they were unaware of what "cock-a-hoop" meant, but local authorities said they would meet such actions with swift reaction, including arrest.
"If 'cock-a-hoop' turns out to be some kind of crime, he'll get his in the form of a can of good 'ol po-lice ass whoopin' opened up on his city-slicking ass," said a local police officer who, in between sips from a highball glass of whiskey, asked to remain anonymous.
NEW YORK, April 16 -- A Web-based writer has used his "blog" site to threaten a life of an online search-and-advertising application developer, whom the writer claims "totally buggered" his Web browser. The writer, who sources say is a man in his early-to-mid-30s, posted an article accusing an as-yet-unidentified software developer of creating an "insidious piece of shit app" that, he said, replaced the default search functionality of his Web browser with a program that directs pop-up ads to his desktop and provides unwanted search results alongside legitimate results.
"Whoever did this is the spawn of Satan and deserves to die slowly and with great, searing pain," the man wrote. "He or she is a disgusting, gelatinous pod of useless tissue that should be crushed under foot." The man went on to write that the developer and the "fucknuts that employ him or her" should "have a cardboard box full of broken glass dropped on his or her head from pretty high up."
The man claims that all of his attempts to disable the application and to restore the default settings on his browser, including uninstalling the errant program; replacing it with a different search application, "Google Toolbar;" and e-mailing the company that created the application for help, have failed.
"I'll kill 'em, I swear it," the man wrote. "They will forever rue the day they fucked with my shit. I will go completely cock-a-hoop on their asses, I mean it."
Sources said they were unaware of what "cock-a-hoop" meant, but local authorities said they would meet such actions with swift reaction, including arrest.
"If 'cock-a-hoop' turns out to be some kind of crime, he'll get his in the form of a can of good 'ol po-lice ass whoopin' opened up on his city-slicking ass," said a local police officer who, in between sips from a highball glass of whiskey, asked to remain anonymous.
posted by Michael at 5:26 PM
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