Q. What was your primary reason for leaving CondeNast?
Please circle as many as apply.


1. Inflexible schedule...got in the way of my sleep patterns and Ephedra habit

2. Inconvenient commute/Relocated...to parents' basement in Westchester

3. Low salary...prevented me from enjoying life's basic needs (EV/LES rent, happy hour margaritas, Radiohead tickets) and impressing friends/family

4. Laid off/position eliminated...when it was discovered I'm an idiot

5. Workload distribution...was unfairly weighted my way, leaving me with little time to gossip about slut-bags in the cafeteria

6. No advancement potential...whereby I could make more money and do less here, and I can’t believe that bitch Dante got promoted over me

7. Found better opportunity...in the lawn care industry

8. School/Internship...was a waste of time but at least Vassar gave me credit you cheap bastards

9. Left with supervisor...to shoot smack in the shadows of another corporate publishing giant

10. Poor management...is a catch-all excuse that really says my boss was a nosy motherfucker, and I want more money

11. Retirement...will be spent in front of a TV watching Whipple’s World, highly medicated

12. Other.. . than my high school job at the Piercing Pagoda this was the worst experience ever